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Post by kawaiitimes on Mar 28, 2015 16:47:01 GMT
Mentioned this on another thread, but figured I'd start my own so I wouldn't threadjack Wendy.
So, for the last decade I have had a Great Dane/Boxer mix. He was about 90lbs and was the best dog I have ever had (I have had dogs my whole life, from beagles to huskies to sheep dogs). After a pretty horrific spinal injury, we had to put him down last year. Our little boy was about 18 months at this time. The two of them were buddies, and the giant dog did a wonderful job of being gentle with our boy.
Now, DH and I are finally ready for another dog. But suddenly, our little boy (now 2.5 years old) is afraid of dogs! As it turn out, my brother's Dachshund bullies my son when he goes over there (brother also has a 2.5 year old boy). When we were there last weekend, this little dog barked at my son, nipped at his legs and jumped on him constantly. My brother has very different animal training / child rearing tactics than I do, and so the dog was never reprimanded and only after I started pulling the dog off my son did my brother finally kennel it.
Having my son be afraid of even little dogs now is really putting a kink in our plans. It is so frustrating!
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Post by Wendy on Mar 28, 2015 17:22:53 GMT
Getting a puppy may be totally different. I have a chihuahua that hates everyone that isn't family. I babysit my nephew a few days a week. He will be 3. They grew up together & she loves him & will tolerate pretty much anything he does to her. She absolutely hates my brother & doesn't care much for my SIL, even though they come here to drop off & pick up my nephew all the time. He may really enjoy a puppy. I had a dachshund that was horrible. He was fine with people but killed 2 baby goats!
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Post by kawaiitimes on Mar 28, 2015 17:26:45 GMT
Maybe. I had hoped we could adopt a young adult dog since our lives are so hectic, and I had hoped to skip over the basic potty training stuff. But now I'm not sure that's a good option.
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Post by Wendy on Mar 28, 2015 17:45:07 GMT
It really depends on the dog. I got my mastiff mix as an adult & she is so laid back & great with the kids.
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Post by kawaiitimes on Mar 28, 2015 18:35:33 GMT
We found another Dane mix that DH and I thought would be a good fit, but the toddler refused to even look at a picture of the "scary" and while we were debating what to do, another family took him home. I would love another Dane mix. We don't have the heart for a full blooded Dane - they just don't live long enough on average.
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Post by mollymckee on Mar 29, 2015 17:25:19 GMT
We have always had dogs, my kids grew up with them. One of my DGD decided she was afraid of dogs and got a lot of attention by screaming. They had dogs, but they were larger dogs and grown up when she was born. They got a puppy and the problem solved itself.
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Post by kawaiitimes on Mar 30, 2015 20:52:57 GMT
Maybe I will have to just suck it up and go the puppy route. The toddler doesn't scream or cry, but jumps with fright whenever a dog barks now, and hides from the dogs behind me/furniture when one is present. We have several friends with dogs of varying sizes, and despite him having met these dogs before, now he will not interact with them.
I had wanted to skip the whole puppy phase as we have a pretty hectic life, which likely won't change for a very long time. And I'm the one who is going to have to take care of the tail-wagger!
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Post by kawaiitimes on Mar 30, 2015 20:56:34 GMT
Also, Pony made a great suggestion in another thread (drug use) about reading books & watching shows with the little guy with dogs in them. He is a voracious little reader already, and he does have a few books about dogs but doesn't enjoy them and wants to rush through them. I'll have to try some old Lassie shows and see if that helps.
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Post by Maura on Mar 30, 2015 21:35:05 GMT
How big is a doxie? Smaller than a Dane puppy. Get the dog or puppy you want. Many children are afraid of dogs, even when they have a dog at home.
Use a crate. Start with putting a stuffed animal in the crate. At this time you can teach your son not to shake the crate, and to drop ONLY dry bread into the crate for the puppy.
When you bring the beast home, put him right into the crate. Let Junior drop kibbles into the crate. This helps to establish a bond and makes your son outrank the puppy. Bring the puppy/dog outside by keeping him on a leash and taking him directly to the outside door. Have him sit in a designated spot that puts him behind you and out of the way of the door swing. Place your hand on his chest while you open the door, then tell him “out” and let him outside. Run him around and work with him on sitting in front of you. This is to teach him not to jump on people. Use treats to reinforce. Don’t let him lick you. Licking is one way to upset a toddler, though he may like it later on.
Bring him back inside and right into the crate. Over the next few days, feed most of puppy’s meals by letting Junior tell the puppy “Rover, sit” and dropping kibble into the crate. This again establishes a relationship and doesn’t let the puppy or dog jump on the kid. It teaches the puppy to sit for Junior instead of bump into him or jump on him.
When the boy takes a nap, you can let the puppy out of the crate, but attach him to you and let him follow you around. As the puppy gets trained you can let him interact more with the boy. They will become the best of friends.
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Post by kawaiitimes on Mar 30, 2015 22:25:27 GMT
Those are some great suggestions. I have done a lot of dog training at all stages, but never have had to do it with tiny children in mind. When DS came along, our Dane mix was getting up in years and was the best babysitter on the planet. Thank you so much for this insight - I would have never thought of combining the crate with teaching the dog not to jump, and getting the toddler to not be afraid.
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Post by Deleted on Apr 1, 2015 21:14:54 GMT
Maybe. I had hoped we could adopt a young adult dog since our lives are so hectic, and I had hoped to skip over the basic potty training stuff. But now I'm not sure that's a good option. Actually I think its a great idea, take your son to a shelter to help pick out the dog, one is bound to snag his heart. You'll miss the dogie equivalent of the terrible twos.
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Post by Maura on Apr 1, 2015 22:50:41 GMT
Actually, I think he is too young to take to the shelter. He is already showing fear of dogs. Besides, he isn’t really going to pick out the dog, you are. However, you can get a golden book on puppies, library books on dog stories to prep him. Once you have the puppy/dog, you and the kid can pick out a collar or harness (I like harnesses when training), he can pick the color. Then, you can pick a leash of the same color. He can pick the color of the dog’s bed if you are getting a bed, and so on. Wrap up the gifts and let Junior open them for the puppy/dog.
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Post by kawaiitimes on Apr 1, 2015 22:52:52 GMT
We still have most of the basic stuff from our previous dog, but would need to get a new collar. Great idea having ds help pick it out.
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Post by manygoatsnmore on Apr 2, 2015 6:20:13 GMT
I will put in my two cents for getting an older, already settled dog. A puppy is going to jump and chew fingers, no matter how much you try. Puppies have to be trained to behave and that takes time. If you ds is already afraid, a puppy jumping up, maybe scratching him or nipping him, is not going to help. An older dog with good manners will be less likely to interact with him in a way that would frighten him. No look, no touch, no eye contact...until your ds is ready for it.
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Post by Maura on Apr 2, 2015 17:23:40 GMT
If you don’t want to buy new, you can still wrap up the stuff and let Junior open it. I’m glad you are putting a lot of thought into this
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Post by kawaiitimes on Apr 2, 2015 18:55:46 GMT
If you don’t want to buy new, you can still wrap up the stuff and let Junior open it. I’m glad you are putting a lot of thought into this Well, this will be my... eighth? dog. All of them were lifetime / majority life pets with the exception of one that I got on an impulse to surprise my ex husband with when he came home from overseas. She was a beautiful young chocolate lab that I found at the shelter. Very nervous (she had obviously been abused before), but with my background with animals I thought we'd be able to work through it. ... 36 hours later she had jumped over our 6' vinyl fence, ran halfway across town and was found running down the center of the interstate. It took an hour of stopped traffic, three truckers and two animal control officers to catch her. She's the only dog I ever returned to the shelter, and she gave me a swift reminder that I can't cure every animal of their issues. I'm also a firm believer that everybody has to pay their way, including the pets. Our cats keep us rodent free, and any dog we have will be responsible for alerting us of strangers and protecting us/property in the event of an emergency. If a dog can't do those two things, then it's not the dog for us.
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Post by bluejeans on Apr 2, 2015 19:08:33 GMT
My son and DIL have two mastiffs...one purebred, one mastiff-GP cross. Those dogs are incredible with their two young sons. Very gentle and mellow...yet protective.
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Post by kawaiitimes on Apr 2, 2015 19:28:50 GMT
My good friend has one Mastiff/St. Bernard, and one Mastiff/Dane mix. They are both amazing dogs and I wouldn't mind looking at something like them (if I could ever find them!). She got both of hers off of Craigslist, but apparently her pet filters and mine are very different because all I can find are teacup poodles, cattle dogs and chihuahuas.
DH really wants a dog exactly like Goliath, our Dane/Boxer mix. I don't think he understands how much of Goliath's awesomeness was training vs. nature though. I wasn't working when I got him at 6 weeks so we did a LOT of training his first year. Unfortunately, I just don't have the time to put into training like that now... otherwise we'd just get a puppy and be done with it.
Maybe I should also mention that in addition to son being scared of dogs, DH is a cat person and for some reason that makes him even pickier about dogs than I am. All I really care about is temperament, willingness to follow directions, and weight range between 60 & 100lbs. It's a good thing I get my way most of the time...
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Post by bluejeans on Apr 2, 2015 19:41:31 GMT
If I, in this lifetime, get to choose my large dog...it will be a mastiff. To this point, our dogs have chosen us. We live in an isolated area...where few strays show up. But every time one has, it's been immediately known...he/she was meant for us. The timing has been perfect, and they've been wonderful family additions.
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Post by aoconnor on Apr 16, 2015 10:57:26 GMT
Have you looked at any of the Great Dane rescues or groups? They might have a "slightly older than puppy" stage dog that you could get. I would not get a puppy, personally, if your little son is already afraid of dogs. He will be terrorized by the puppy antics that most all puppies have, including jumping up and licking, nibbling, etc. it may worsen your sons fears rather than assuage them.
On the other hand, Danes and Dane mixes are generally very large dogs; your son would have to meet the dog when the dog is in a "down" position and the boy could maybe see it is safe to trust that dog. I imagine that your boy will come around, it will take some time, and possibly you telling him that the dog isn't going to hurt him and to stop being afraid of it!!! I do that with my grand daughter! She screams and runs behind me when a dog nears her (even though she has 3 at home!!). She is afraid of strange dogs. I tell her to stop it, no more screaming, calm down, and then pet the dog. She is fine after that:-)
Doxies are notorious for biting children. When my brother was very young, he was bitten in the face by a "very docile, child acclimated" Doxy. My brother didn't do anything but sit quietly on the couch next to our mom while visiting a lady who had doxies, when suddenly one of her dogs leaped up onto the couch and bit my brother in the face unprovoked! They are testy little dogs at times, it is a shame your brother won't control his while you and your family are there visiting and it has made your son fearful of dogs.
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Post by kawaiitimes on Apr 17, 2015 4:37:05 GMT
I have contacted a couple, but no luck yet. We will see what comes along.
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Post by motdaugrnds on Apr 27, 2015 23:37:33 GMT
You are getting great advice; and you sound knowledgeable. I personally would focus on my son as much as the type of dog. By this I mean I would not feel sorry or play into the fears of a 2 yr old. You can understand and even let him hide if he wants; but do not give him attention for that.
Using the crate idea Maura suggested is great, as is the idea of getting an older dog with a very, very calm energy level.
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Post by kawaiitimes on Apr 28, 2015 9:01:36 GMT
I agree with this, and once we find the right dog we will spend time with the toddler and dog together so that I can teach them both commands/commanding techniques. I am sure that the majority of DS's fear comes from having no control. I am hopeful that we can find a dog who we can train/already knows "down", "off", "sit" commands so that the toddler has a way to keep his distance if he wants to.
My brother, God love him, hasn't done any training that I can see. When I dropped in a few days ago their dog was being rough with my nephew (also 2 years old), and he solved the problem by kicking the dog off the couch. THAT is also something that I will not allow.
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Post by kawaiitimes on May 26, 2015 21:52:33 GMT
We are back on the hunt, although I realized that a year and a half of neglect our back yard HAS to be cleaned up before we get another dog. I haven't spent any time back there since putting our dog down and the yard has been overtaken by blackberries. Yikes. Gotta get back there with a shovel and some hedge trimmers to get it back to livable again.
But, wanted to pass along that DS has now found 3 medium/large dogs at some events we've been to this Spring that he has been comfortable going up to and petting on the back (while holding Mommy/Daddy's hand). We just saw a cow/shepherd mix twice who he talked to and petted without much fear - until the dog flopped over to have her tummy rubbed. That freaked DS out a bit.
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Post by aoconnor on Jun 5, 2015 12:17:45 GMT
We are back on the hunt, although I realized that a year and a half of neglect our back yard HAS to be cleaned up before we get another dog. I haven't spent any time back there since putting our dog down and the yard has been overtaken by blackberries. Yikes. Gotta get back there with a shovel and some hedge trimmers to get it back to livable again. But, wanted to pass along that DS has now found 3 medium/large dogs at some events we've been to this Spring that he has been comfortable going up to and petting on the back (while holding Mommy/Daddy's hand). We just saw a cow/shepherd mix twice who he talked to and petted without much fear - until the dog flopped over to have her tummy rubbed. That freaked DS out a bit. Glad to hear your little boy is getting better! It is lovely to see a young boy and his dog...hopefully that day will come for you guys:-)
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Post by Otter on Jun 5, 2015 14:08:57 GMT
I will put in my two cents for getting an older, already settled dog. A puppy is going to jump and chew fingers, no matter how much you try. Puppies have to be trained to behave and that takes time. If you ds is already afraid, a puppy jumping up, maybe scratching him or nipping him, is not going to help. An older dog with good manners will be less likely to interact with him in a way that would frighten him. No look, no touch, no eye contact...until your ds is ready for it. This is the exact advice I was going to give. Puppies will puppy, and especially if you want a large breed, that's a lot of puppy. When my GSD was 4 months she was over 30 lbs and could easily knock a toddler down with a hard wag and scratch one badly with a playful paw wave. No malicious intent whatsoever, just puppy joy and clumsiness, but a toddler doesn't know that. Get a large, mellow dog at least a year old. If these events you've been to are adoption events, bring the cow(? lol)/shepherd mix home. If not, look for one with her vibe.
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Post by kawaiitimes on Jun 5, 2015 17:05:39 GMT
I will put in my two cents for getting an older, already settled dog. A puppy is going to jump and chew fingers, no matter how much you try. Puppies have to be trained to behave and that takes time. If you ds is already afraid, a puppy jumping up, maybe scratching him or nipping him, is not going to help. An older dog with good manners will be less likely to interact with him in a way that would frighten him. No look, no touch, no eye contact...until your ds is ready for it. This is the exact advice I was going to give. Puppies will puppy, and especially if you want a large breed, that's a lot of puppy. When my GSD was 4 months she was over 30 lbs and could easily knock a toddler down with a hard wag and scratch one badly with a playful paw wave. No malicious intent whatsoever, just puppy joy and clumsiness, but a toddler doesn't know that. Get a large, mellow dog at least a year old. If these events you've been to are adoption events, bring the cow(? lol)/shepherd mix home. If not, look for one with her vibe. Ha! That was meant to say "Chow/Shepherd". No, the events we go to are big paintball events for our business. We vend, sponsor & promote at paintball gatherings throughout the spring and summer, although this year will likely have a lighter schedule since we are going through so many transitions right now.
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Post by manygoatsnmore on Jun 5, 2015 17:54:14 GMT
Hahaha, I didn't catch the cow/Chow the first time around - usually I jump all over the funny typos (just my wacky sense of humor). A chow/shepherd mix would be big, but a cow? Wow - that would have some size, lol. It would be a cow that could herd itself!
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Post by kawaiitimes on Jun 5, 2015 18:24:22 GMT
It would be a cow that could herd itself! Now that is funny right there!
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Post by Otter on Jun 5, 2015 20:03:56 GMT
Y'know, it's funny. I strongly dislike chows. Mostly because they strongly dislike everyone on earth except for one person, and there is a wide streak of instability through the breed.
But chow mixes are freaking AWESOME! I only know one breed that doesn't mix well with Chows, and those are Pyrs (met 5 of that cross, different litters, heck, 2 different states, all killers, half were also human aggressive) But every other cross I've met would be hard tied for Best Dog Ever. They have included some of my all time favorite dogs, including our Chow/Aussie cross, Chex. Sweet, friendly and wildly easy to train.
I wouldn't say to get a Chow unless you want your kid to never have any friends except the dog (sorry Chow lovers) but if you can find a chow mix, go for it.
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