Thing I learned from my horses- Part 2
May 3, 2017 14:06:24 GMT
Woodpecker, solargeek, and 4 more like this
Post by here to stay on May 3, 2017 14:06:24 GMT
Once before (on another site and another time) I started a thread about what my horses have taught me about myself. This morning I was thinking about that theme again. Specifically about how sometimes I think I have communicated when I have not even really done it at all.
Well, my horses cured me of that foolishness. They are not in the least anxious to figure out what's going on in my head. If you don't ask, you don't get. And your wants need to be unambiguous. If a horse isn't given a clear instruction he can understand, he will default to consulting his own judgement and it is unlikely you'll be happy with it.
I can remember my very first catastrophic failure to communicate with my very first horse. I set off at a canter down a fence line. I lost a rein and panicked as I approached the end of the line. I just set there like a lump as my horse, now full out galloping, reached a point where it was either go over the fence, stop or make a sharp turn. In one short instant I felt the horse asking what he was to do shifting his body slightly to the right and left. When instructions did not come, he chose- a sudden 90 degree turn without reducing pace. He might have gone to the right but I continued into the fence all by myself. And all I had to have done was say 'whoa.' He was a very cooperative soul.
He wanted me to tell him what to do in the most specific terms. I failed to do it and could not blame him for the results. Since then I have developed a habit of not just thinking but making sure I say it too.
Not saying specifically what you want is quite common. In inter human relationships as well as horse relationships. People think they have said something but they didn't. They just thought about it. They huffily expect mindreading, not realizing they never once vocalized 'no.' But my horses did cure me of that error. If things go wrong, I review my communications to make sure I said what I was thinking, not just think I said it. 'No' is a mighty powerful wordif actually said.
Well, my horses cured me of that foolishness. They are not in the least anxious to figure out what's going on in my head. If you don't ask, you don't get. And your wants need to be unambiguous. If a horse isn't given a clear instruction he can understand, he will default to consulting his own judgement and it is unlikely you'll be happy with it.
I can remember my very first catastrophic failure to communicate with my very first horse. I set off at a canter down a fence line. I lost a rein and panicked as I approached the end of the line. I just set there like a lump as my horse, now full out galloping, reached a point where it was either go over the fence, stop or make a sharp turn. In one short instant I felt the horse asking what he was to do shifting his body slightly to the right and left. When instructions did not come, he chose- a sudden 90 degree turn without reducing pace. He might have gone to the right but I continued into the fence all by myself. And all I had to have done was say 'whoa.' He was a very cooperative soul.
He wanted me to tell him what to do in the most specific terms. I failed to do it and could not blame him for the results. Since then I have developed a habit of not just thinking but making sure I say it too.
Not saying specifically what you want is quite common. In inter human relationships as well as horse relationships. People think they have said something but they didn't. They just thought about it. They huffily expect mindreading, not realizing they never once vocalized 'no.' But my horses did cure me of that error. If things go wrong, I review my communications to make sure I said what I was thinking, not just think I said it. 'No' is a mighty powerful wordif actually said.
